Social Anxiety and Self Esteem: Understanding The Link
Many people wonder about the connection between social anxiety and low self-esteem.
While these two challenges can often appear together, they're actually distinct issues that exist independently. Today, let's dive into their relationship and learn how to identify which one you might be dealing with.
The Connection
Social anxiety and low self-esteem often dance together in a complex relationship.
Sometimes, social anxiety emerges as a manifestation of low self-esteem. In other cases, struggling with social anxiety can gradually chip away at one's self-esteem. It's important to note that social anxiety disorder is a diagnosable mental health condition, while low self-esteem is not – though both can significantly impact your quality of life.
Let's take a look at some of the different, and overlapping symptoms:
Low self esteem and social anxiety diagram
As we can see, there are many overlaps, as well as differences.
Rather than behaviours, it can be useful to look at the the underlying rationales of symptoms to better understand each condition.
Rationales Behind Symptoms
People Pleasing
Low Self-Esteem: You might engage in people-pleasing because you feel fundamentally unworthy or less valuable than others. Your focus is on earning approval to validate your worth.
Social Anxiety: Your people-pleasing may stem from a fear of negative evaluation or judgment. You're trying to avoid uncomfortable conversations or conflict.
Excessive Apologising
Low Self-Esteem: You might apologise frequently because you feel fundamentally at fault and blame yourself for everything.
Social Anxiety: Your apologies might be driven by fears of having said something wrong or rude, and you're trying to prevent negative reactions.
Self-Criticism
Low Self-Esteem: Your self-criticism might focus on your fundamental worth and character.
Social Anxiety: You might primarily criticise your social performance and interactions.
Difficulty Accepting Compliments
Low Self-Esteem: You might struggle with compliments because you don't believe you deserve them or think they must be incorrect.
Social Anxiety: Compliments might make you uncomfortable because you don't want attention or focus on yourself.
Avoiding Groups
Low Self-Esteem: You might avoid groups because you feel you're not good enough to belong and don't deserve inclusion.
Social Anxiety: Your avoidance might stem from fear of social judgment and scrutiny, often accompanied by physical symptoms and pressure to perform socially.
Important note: it can be possible to relate to both rationales and experiences.
The Building Block Effect
Sometimes, these issues can create a snowball effect. For instance, social anxiety might lead to avoiding social situations, which then results in fewer positive social experiences. This can gradually erode self-esteem, creating a cycle that reinforces both issues.
Important Takeaways
Not everyone with low self-esteem has social anxiety, though many people with social anxiety experience impacts on their self-esteem.
The responses to similar situations often have different underlying motivations.
It's possible to experience both conditions simultaneously, with symptoms overlapping.
Understanding the root cause of your symptoms can help guide you toward the most effective support and coping strategies.
Note: This blog post is for informational purposes only and should not be considered medical advice. If you're struggling with social anxiety or low self-esteem, consider reaching out to a mental health professional who can provide personalised guidance and support. If you're a professional sharing this blog with your patient, you do so at your own risk and professional judgement. Blog posts do not constitute supervisory advice.